Lately, I’ve been deep in the New York Times puzzle universe—the Connections, Mini Crossword, Spelling Bee, Strands, and of course, the almighty Crossword. It started as a fun mental warm-up. Now it’s starting to feel like a daily IQ test I didn’t sign up for.

I am sucking at Connections right now.
Absolutely blowing it.

For some reason, I look at the words, and they mean exactly what they are.
My mind just isn’t making the connection.
It’s got to be a metaphor.

I feel like my synapses aren’t sparking the right way.
The past couple of weeks, my record on Connections has been pathetic.
I’m usually great at patterns, codes, puzzles. But right now, the only puzzle is why I’m so bad at this one.

I’ve tried different times of day.
I’ll admit: I don’t do well when I’m tired or not fully awake.
Maybe that’s the metaphor—don’t try to do anything unless I’m well-rested.
Or maybe it’s telling me to pay better attention to what’s going on around me.

Maybe it’s not just the puzzle I’m bad at.
Maybe it’s the part of my brain that used to click into patterns like it was second nature.
Maybe it’s telling me something—about rest, or change, or just this weird stretch of mental weather.
There’s something unsettling about staring at familiar words and not being able to see past their literal meaning.
It feels like a muscle I’ve always relied on is suddenly out of shape.

Believe me, I need that kind of awareness to do most of the work I do. So this disconnect is driving me crazy.

These days, I just let Connections ride, for the most part.
There was a time when I’d feel genuinely disappointed seeing “Better Luck Next Time.”
Now? Eh.
Some of the categories are ridiculous. Countries—but only by the first few letters of their names? Seriously? That’s fun?
Maybe if I were in a different mood, it would be. Sigh.

And then there are the other games.

I hate to admit it. I’m embarrassed to admit it.
But I actually asked for help on the Mini Crossword this morning.
The Mini!
Just exile me to a lower intellectual plane right now.

I never ask for help on the Mini. Ever.
I love the Mini. It gives me comfort. I pay attention to my completion times. I compete with myself.
I feel so… sad.

Then there’s the Spelling Bee.

Honestly, I don’t even care if it doesn’t take me to Genius level anymore. Why?
Because some legitimate words aren’t accepted.
Tonation, for example. It’s a word.
Look it up, Spelling Bee creators/coordinators/whatever you’re called. It is a word.

Ha! I just hit Genius on Spelling Bee. I sense a conspiracy.

I was doing Strands, but it isn’t worth my time.
I played it religiously—until I realized it wasn’t fun, just an OCD tic.

Wordle. I can’t complain about Wordle.
I do normal Wordle, not the hard Wordle, because I embrace Wordle and am doing fine.
If I started doing the hard Wordle and started to fail, I don’t know what would happen.
I don’t want to chance it.

The Crossword is the holy grail.
I can’t complain about the Crossword. I can only improve.
Everyone knows it gets harder as the week progresses and resets to easy on Monday.

Last night, I thought I was doing the Sunday Crossword and was amazed by how easy it felt.
I was glowing with pride.
Then I realized it had already flipped to the Monday Crossword.
Needless to say, I was no longer glowing.

I don’t think it’s healthy for my emotional state to be so tethered to these games.

And yet, they’re also a form of procrastination.
Which somehow just became the inspiration for this Bits and Bobs column.

Two birds, I suppose.

— Rindraty Celes Limtiaco is co-founder of My Jungle Rules. She often gets carried away and fascinated by the mundane. But when those moments happen and they turn into writing material, she feels like she won.